Mistakes & Decisions

“If I had to live my life over again, I’d make the same mistakes, only sooner.”  Tallulah Bankhead

woman writing in notebook pexels-photo Negative space
~Photo http://www.pexels.com Negative Space

My problem is that I feel as though I keep making the same mistakes.

Different chorus, same song!  Aren’t we supposed to grow in wisdom?

I sometimes think that the answer lies in how busy I am; how bombarded I am with information (Maybe ignorance is bliss!); and how free I am to make my own decisions.  I am free in the sense that for the most part I am a free agent.  I like to think that I can do what I want when I want.  Not always true.  Maybe rarely true but it sounds good!

I also have a fear of being wrong.   I don’t want to regret a decision later.  Of course, the effect of some decisions can’t be know until years later.  I have to watch myself that I don’t end up with “analysis paralysis”.  To combat this, I give myself deadlines for  making a decision.  Here are my steps.

  1. In the first time period, think and research the issue in terms of known data.
  2. In the next time period, identify my emotional responses.  Try to determine what which decision would make me happy?  What would make my family happy?  Talk with those who would be affected.
  3. In the next time period, take a day or two off to let everything settle but set a definite “decision date”.
  4. On the decision date, make it as early in the day as possible.  Review and decide.
  5. Begin to implement and don’t look back. Also, I limit or eliminate discussions with family and friends who try to dissuade me.

I use the phrase “time period” because some decisions require more time such as deciding whether or not to sell my house. Other decisions such as selecting a new carpet require less time.

This process does not guarantee perfect decisions but it does allow me to move forward.

I am reminded my friend’s sister who could not decide on what kind of finish she wanted for her door.  So, for five years, the door was unfinished.  She finally decided when she was putting her house on the market.  So, for a few weeks instead of years, she enjoyed her finished door.

Time flies and making no decision is a decision.

 

 

18 thoughts on “Mistakes & Decisions

  1. Great wisdom can be found in the most innocuous places Lori. But the one’s under our nose’s tend to take a bit of time. But that is so we will absorb them and realise the love of ourselves in making them. Those fears are the very thing that block…our walls to jump over, break through, torpedo or take a slingshot to, and are there so that we will find that inner heart, and believe it or not, those impediments to decision making vanish the moment that we do our fears in ❤
    Now give yourself a hug and accept you exactly how you are, and a coffee with your feet up to test this new found freedom 😀 ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Wow that sounds a rather scientific process you are going through. Impressive. I usually follow my guts. They seem to know the right thing. However, sometimes the wrong thing seems to be the right thing and I have come to the conclusion that these are important to my improvement too: sometimes you need to experience something bad to appreciate the good!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh this is an interesting one. Indecision has never been an issue for me: I find it quite easy to make up my mind about big, important things. Yet….. trivial, inconsequential things cause me to dither and waste time while trying to decide…! Bizarre or what. X

  4. making no decision is some sort of “decision not to act or to procrastinate”. Decisions are sometimes difficult. I like to sleep over something if I am not sure in which direction my decision will take me. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. “I also have a fear of being wrong. I don’t want to regret a decision later.”…..been there, done that. Inevitably, though, I find that there are times I just have to turn it over to God/the Universe and let the final decision flow through me. Otherwise I go nuts. I totally can relate to you, Lori…..

    Like

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