Who I Am & Why I Am Here…

I often feel as though my life has been lived as a subset of someone else’s life.  Not that it was not good. It was so good in so many ways. Good to be a wife, a mother, a sister, an employee. Now, it is different as a widow, as a person who is not accountable to anyone. There is great freedom in being alone but also great loneliness and much sadness.

So I turned to writing to fill the void.  It was like visiting an old friend with whom I could share everything.  I have written my entire life.  I have received accolades.  I have been published.  I never took it to the next level.  I did not have the confidence…the know-how.

Now is my time. I am entering into my stride as a woman and I have something to say. About being a widow…left in the darkness that no light could penetrate.  About learning to cope when all I wanted to do was curl up and go to sleep.

I am stronger than I ever thought possible. I set goals. I listed tasks. I accomplished them. This is me.  A person who refuses to give in.  I have made a new life.  It is not the life I planned but it works and I am happy.  I have much for which I am grateful.  I have much to learn.

Writing is a way to express my thoughts, to celebrate living, to learn about others’ lives, to share the journey with others and, hopefully, to contribute to others.

“If we live good lives, the times are also good.  As we are, such are the times.” St. Augustine.

“‘Win the Day’ former Oregon coach Chip Kelly’s mantra for the Oregon Ducks football team:  to take care of what you can control today instead of looking down the road too often; to treat every game like it’s the National Championship.” Urban Dictionary

134 thoughts on “Who I Am & Why I Am Here…

  1. Your blog is so full of life and beautiful words. I’m happy you visited my blog because now I’ve had a chance to visit yours! Looking forward to reading more 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. “Writing is a way to express my thoughts, to celebrate living, to learn about others’ lives, to share the journey with others and, hopefully, to contribute to others.” Oh, I am very sure I will learn much from you!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I often feel as though my life has been lived as a subset of someone else’s life. Lordy! I SO yelled YES! when I read your words! Thank you for putting so succinctly what I’ve been trying to say since October 2014 on here. Oh, and thanks so much for the follow. I shall return the favor! Looking forward to getting to know you. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Thank you for your encouraging post! I, too, endured feeling like a widow after the “death” of my marriage a couple of years ago. I know its not the same, but tragic nevertheless. I said I felt like I was in an abyss. Yet, yes! I have also discovered myself and the gratefulness of what life has to offer. Thank you, Lori, for your perspective! And thanks to St. Augustine for the gentle reminder.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Being a widow … not a fun club to belong to – my kids’ dad passed away 24 years ago – and as Earth Bound said, each of my 2 divorces were deaths of a marriage. But life goes on … and it is not always what you expect it will be! And yet it, indeed, does not define who we are. And we are stronger in the end for having experienced and grown from it. Hugs.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I found your blog through your liking of my comment on Cee’s return. I’m glad I did. 23 years ago I married a wonderful woman who was a widow for almost two years. It was a struggle for her at first, but what a life we have had over the last 2+ decades. I don’t know what you went through, but I have some idea from my experiences. Your upbeat blog is a very positive sign.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I really love your outlook and your attitude. I can imagine that it must be a great contrast to go from playing the many roles that you did in your past to now being on your own. I have spent time worrying about the future and fearing being alone, but I like how you view it as freedom. And yes, you are never alone. You have accomplished many beautiful things in your life so far and have many wonderful things to come.
    Love, Blessings, and Hugs,
    ❤ Alana

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Alana, You are so kind. Your words went straight to my heart. With your attitude and grace, you will always have people who love you in your life. Love, blessings, thanks and hugs to you this evening! Lori

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Thank you for the visit although I’m not sure how you found me. I had another site on which I played many songs from the 70′[s-80’s, but closed it down. This is now my site and it’s devoted to sharing about Jesus and God.

    You sound like a very strong lady who may even be capable of more if you are not already following the Lord. If you are, good for you! Either way, please feel free to visit again…


    Liked by 1 person

  9. God has you in His plans Lori and with that you will discover new and wonderful things about yourself as you navigate this new chapter in your life. Be prepared though I believe there is a lot of joy in the pages to come.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Hi Lori, I’m excited to learn more from you and read your beautiful story. “Now is my time. I am entering into my stride as a woman and I have something to say.” I’m right here with you!! I have something to say too:-)

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I am glad you found my blog, Lori, because now I’ve found you. You write beautifully. Scheduling my colonoscopy has been on my “to do” list for a couple of weeks. Making the appointment today, even tho I hate it 😖

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Hi Lori, I just read you blog with the wonderful column from ” Earl”. Great read. Here in Canada we are still scratching our heads at Mr Trumps angered tweets about Mr Trudeau just after what we thought had been a successful and communicative G7 Summit. Strange times …., I always like to read how you are all riding out the wave

    Liked by 2 people

    1. My family & friends can’t believe what is going on. This administration is frustrating and exasperating. We struggle to stay positive and work for change through election while helping each other. I see and experience a lot more community involvement to help each other. This has been a wake-up call that we must care for all of our citizens so that populist leaders don’t gain power again. Everyone needs a place at the table. Sorry for the long answer. I don’t know “Earl”. Is the column on the website? I would love to read it. Thank you for “talking” with me. Have a great week. Lori

      Liked by 2 people

    2. Lori I was referring to the gentleman who’s column you mentioned in your last post “Earl Blumenauer, Congressman from Oregon.” I am sorry it is confusing to read me no doubt as for some reason I can no longer comment on your actual postings.
      Thanks for taking the time to read me. Sending positive thoughts to you and daughter in law and countrymen

      Liked by 2 people

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