A Special Hell

Sign posted on the wall in the hospital.

My daughter in law has been in the hospital for several days enduring tests and procedures to determine the cause of her illness.

In the meantime, I have been taking care of eight-month old Mabel and walking and praying.

Mabel enjoying a stroll before bedtime. 

Strangers always stop to comment on how cute Mabel is.

Now strangers stop to comfort her Grandmother (me).

This is so hard.

It is hell all over again for my son and me.

It is hell for all of our family.

Waiting.  Anxious. Hoping for the best.

We received an answer.

This Can’t Be Happening

Stage 4 Cancer.

She is a new mom with her first Mother’s Day coming up.

We are terrified, overwhelmed and grief-stricken.

Soon, we hope to have a plan of treatment from the doctors.

I wish I could trade places with her.

I would gladly take this burden from her and my son.

My heart aches for her, my son and their sweet baby girl Mabel.

Life in limbo.







58 thoughts on “A Special Hell

  1. Man. This is awful news. Bad, bad news and the type that never has good timing. But this timing…it’s just extra-not-special bad timing.
    That said, I’ve had a couple of friends that have had a similar sounding diagnosis and have each been cancer free for multiple years. That’s the result I’m focused on for you and your family.
    I’m not a pray-er type, but I have a couple of friend that swear by it and include me in theirs often – I guess they think I need it. 😬 One in particular asks me if I need him to pray for anything for me…today I have an answer.
    Mothers have an amazing inner strength. I know yours will serve your family well today, but don’t forget to take care of you, too. Take that walk.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I am so sorry. There is nothing to hit the like for but in order to comment it has to be done. This is so sad. I will pray for your daughter-in-law in my daily prayers. Life is so precious and hopefully, the doctors will help. There are so many new treatments now. Keep the faith and we will send prayers your way.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Lori, I am so very sorry that your world has been turned upside down with this news. There is another blogger who I follow who is thirty-five years old with two small children. She was recently diagnosed with Stage 4 colon cancer and is writing about this journey. She is a great writer and funny and upbeat. She had a earlier blog chronicling her adventure as a surrogate mother. Her name is Genessa and you might want to check her out https://notfullstop.wordpress.com/

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I’m so sorry Lori, I hate cancer with a vengeance but these days there are new cures found all the time.
    I send a little Welsh magic and a huge wish that she responds well to whatever treatment she’s given.
    Please pass my best wishes to your son, having been in his position I really feel for him. Mabel is lucky to have her loving grandmother around to help care for her.
    xxx Sending you Massive Hugs xxx

    Liked by 2 people

  5. It’s just not fair. But whoever said life was fair? I join with the community here who send their thoughts and prayers for your daughter-in-law and her family. I’m so sorry. It’s a time for family to pull together and I know you are doing that.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Oh, Lori. My heart is breaking for you and your son and that little one. I don’t want to “like” it either but I will do it as a sign of support. Fate is so fucking fickle. I wish I had words to comfort you. Know that you and yours are in my thoughts and my heart.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Special Hell for you all, that no one deserves and we all fear.. I hope writing is a comfort of sorts, for you..
    That the future holds much more brightness than the darkness you must feel overwhelmed by.
    I’m praying with you

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Lori, thank you for sharing this journey with those of us who read your posts and enjoy them so very much. You are a positive and loving person and your family is blessed to have you with them at this time. I would love to hold and hug sweet Mabel. Prayers for all of you to be strong for one another and a full recovery for your daughter in law.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Lorraine,
    I continue to vigilantly pray for Victoria. Also for you, Mark, and Mabel. I reflect back on your journey with Dan and know this is doubly hard for you and the boys.
    Tonight I asked my prayer warriors at bible study to pray daily for Victoria. Rest assured these ladies will be praying for all of you every morning. Cling to Philippians 4:6 “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let you requests be made known to God.”
    Hold on tight to Mabel and let her provide the comfort you so desperately need. Babies have a way of helping us when we need it the most.
    Love you my friend. Wish I could be there with you, but I’m holding you up from afar.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I could not hit the like or any other buttons. Where and how far has the cancer travelled?. I know this is terrible to ask but I too believe in the miraculous workings of God sometimes in the most desperate of circumstances. Hugs from across the sea. My heart is seared for you, and both the young ones and their child. I will pray. A-men to Natalie’s prayer above.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I’m stunned by the news – please know I am praying for your family, and I do believe that prayer can bestow the strength you’ll need in the coming months as your daughter-in-law fights this monster – and wins. My love to all of you.

    Liked by 1 person

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