Tuesday, 9.24.2019

Hello friends,

I am currently the daily caretaker for my terminally-ill daughter in law.

She is at home in hospice care.

Our days go on mostly unchanged.

~Photo pexels.com pixabay~

My Grandchild

I am also the playmate of her 3-year old daughter.

My sweet grandchild goes to nursery school everyday.

It is a joy to walk her there each day.

People smile when we pass them on the street or the college campus.

She is a beautiful, engaging child.

She chatters almost every step of the way and holds my hand…comforting to both of us.

 

Her Mother

Then there is the daily life of her Mother.

Most of it is spent napping or watching Netflix.

We do a “dance” several times a day as I help her go from her bed or the couch to her wheelchair and back.  She is surprisingly heavy even though she is probably the size of a ten-year old child.

Almost every weekday, a friend will bring her lunch and sit with her.

She has a good appetite in spite of her lack of physical activity.

This outside connection enlarges her world.

This life is a far cry from her previous days of working as a nurse at a busy hospital.

 

Her Dad

My son’s life is fragmented between work and helping to care for his wife, his child, their two dogs and other obligations.

People bring food three times a week which almost eliminates the need to cook.

The house is tense as we all three deal with the sadness of the situation.

My Granddaughter sometimes refuses to walk because “her legs don’t work”.

 

Then, there’s the Grandmother

I am here trying to relieve my son of some of the burden he carries.

I stay with his wife so he and his daughter can take walks together or even go to the grocery store.

I do laundry, empty the dishwasher, rake up the leaves, sweep the walkways…

The things we do for love.

~~Not very well-written but I wanted to share some of what’s going on now.  So many of you have been so supportive during this long, sad journey.  You have helped me to carry my burden.

 

 

31 thoughts on “Tuesday, 9.24.2019”

  4. Much love and light to you all Lori, it is not an easy journey. You can do so many things to help but the one thing you want the most is out of your control.
    That takes great courage, faith and a love like no other…a mothers love ❤️

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  10. Straight from your heart, Lori, and extraordinarily well written.
    Sending you love and strength and as much joy as can be wrung from this sad situation.
    Because you know you wouldn’t have done anything differently if this is the only way you could ever had had the pleasure of your daughter-in-law in your life, along with the precious child who is the evidence of the love between your son and his beloved wife.

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  14. Lori, it seems some of us are destined to be caretakers. You are inspiring to me and I know you’re just doing what has to be done, but not everyone would step in and do that as willingly. Hope you are able to take some time to take care of yourself 😘. Sending hugs

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    1. Thank you. I am especially concerned for my son and his little girl…This is and will continue to be a rough transition for them. It is gratifying to take a little bit of the burden off of his shoulders.
      Tomorrow I am taking a few hours to visit a hair salon. Later I hope to find time for a manicure and maybe a massage.
      Take care and thank you for your kind words and the hugs…always needed and appreciated. Lori

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      1. I understand. I lost my husband suddenly last December and my children are in their 30s and my stepchildren are in their 40s and 50s and it’s been tough on them all. My heart breaks for your son and granddaughter losing someone so young! Know that we are all thinking of you…

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  19. From a distance thoughts and prayers from us here. This will be TOUGH BEYOND WORDS. You must sit quietly. Grace outpours at times like this in unprecedented ways. Surrender to Christ and indeed let faith in His Eternity be revealed to you in ways that minister to your need. This earth indeed is not the final home for any of us who BELIEVE. May your daughter-in-law, son, and grand-daughter be certain of this as these difficult days are lived through. Blessings! Peace!

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  21. I will say a prayer for you and your family. I was the caretaker for my Mother during the final months of her time here. It’s not easy and takes a while to move beyond the emotion after our loved one goes home.

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